This page has already been transcribed. You can find new pages to transcribe here.

Transcription

[Page 54]

And, indeed, 'tis a point of incertitude, whether
The COURT had not lost all the Ladies together,
If EDMUND, Great EDMUND! who always attends,
Had not made us, on Thursday, some little amends.
But now, in discharge of my trust as RECORDER,
The Proceedings of Thursday I'll give you in order.

PLUMBOSO address'd himself thus to the Peers-
"My Luds, I shall state in the course of three years,
"All the Revenues which in BENGAL were collected,
"Amounted to less than what HASTINGS expected:
"In the three former years I shall shew an excess,
"Whilst the following three were productive of less."
'Twere needless the Evidence here to rehearse-
'Tis sufficient to say -- that it prov'd the reverse.
PLUMBOSO next said -- He was ready and willing
To prove GOONGA GOVIND a terrible villain;
And, this to effect, he proceeded to quote
A Letter, which LARKINS from INDIA wrote-
It stated that GOONGA'S detention of treasure,
In HASTINGS'S mind had excited displeasure;
Then the Hero, from HASTINGS, a document brought,
To shew GOONGA GOVIND was never in fault.
At the moment, it struck me, that this accusation
Was brought against HASTINGS, in retaliation
For SCOTT'S charging PLUMMY with like variation.
Perhaps, in your snarling sarcastical way,
On the reading of this, you'll be tempted to say-
That LARKINS and HASTINGS, like Calvin and Luther,
Are persons distinct, but that PLUMB and ANSTRUTHER
Are one and the same -- and 'tis thence more absurd,
In PLUMMY to vary from ANSTRUTHER'S word.

Having thus prov'd that GOONGA was vastly to blame,
He would prove KELLORAM was precisely the same-
An unprincipled fellow, (perhaps a Disserter),
And therefore unfit for a Company's Renter.
This Character-cutting awaken'd the feeling
Of the soft-hearted LAW, who is clever at healing.
He mov'd-"That the MANAGERS might not enlarge
"On matter which could not be found in the Charge."
Here the business appear'd to be ill understood,
For tho' LAW could not find it, the MANAGERS cou'd:
For Character-cutting PLUMBOSO contended,
And declar'd, upon that the whole Trial depended-
"For my Luds, to your Ludships unless we can state
"That HASTINGS'S Renters were villains complete,
"That his motives were bad beyond all contradiction,
"We shall never be able to carry conviction."

Here BURKE, springing up, a comparison drew
From the Merchant of VENICE and SHYLOCK the Jew.
In language pathetic the Leader complain'd,
That in cutting of HASTINGS his hand is restrain'd:
"My Lords, on reflection, it needs must be found,
"That the Counsel have taken untenable ground-
"From the body of HASTINGS, suppose it be true,
"That but one pound of flesh is the MANAGERS' due,
"Yet we hope that your Lordships will let us take two.
"In criminal cases, except only this-
"In precision, perhaps, there is nothing amiss;
"But the cutting of HASTINGS, and spilling his blood,
"For the cure of extortion's a recipe good:
"So we trust that your LORDSHIPS will not bid us stop,
"But let us proceed till we spill the last drop.
"My LORDS, to the Proverb whoever attends,
"Must know that a chain has a couple of ends;
"And that, by experience, 'tis constantly found,
"That the person who binds, is in vinculo bound:
"That is, whosoever brings forth accusation,
"Is bound to establish his own allegation.
"My LORDS, in the cause we are hearty and steady,
"And to prove all we say are both willing and ready;
"And do it we shall, by God's blessing and gift,
"If your Honour and Justice will lend us a lift:
"Your LORDSHIPS, I think, must undoubtedly know,
"How much we are hated above and below:
"If HASTINGS hereafter acquitted should be,
"Pray what must become of my colleagues and me?
"Your LORDSHIPS should, therefore, in commiseration
"Of our dangers, indulge us in strong aggravation."

And I think, my dear BROTHER, as most people must,
'Twere better that HASTINGS, by sentence unjust,
Shou'd suffer for crimes that he never committed,
Than BURKE be disgrac'd by his being acquitted:
But LAW, who, perhaps, never made this reflection,
Or weakly supposes a Lawyer's protection
Is due to the Client, renew'd his objection.
So the LORDS were in consequence forc'd to retreat,
And on KELLORAM'S character held a debate.

They return'd -- and the MANAGERS then were acquainted,
That KELLORAM'S character must not be tainted;
But EDMUND, much hurt by their LORDSHIP'S decision,
Made a comment or two, in the way of revision:-

"The COMMONS, my LORDS, do but ill understand,
"The technical forms of the Law of the land;
"And as few of us here are professional men,
"We a latitude claim for the tongue and the pen;
"And not being bred in LEGALITY'S Schools,
"We set at defiance all shackles and rules:
"We are privileg'd men, and the Guardians of Freedom,
"And liberties take whensoever we need 'em.
"My LORDS, there must follow a consequence bad,
"If the MANAGERS are not permitted to add
"New matter at pleasure, without going back
"To St. STEPHEN'S for license to change the attack.
"From the Chapel new Charges, 'tis true, we may bring,
"And give the old Story about DEBY SING:
"But I wish not, my LORDS, to put this to the proof,
"Lest the Commons shou'd say, we have voted enough.
"My LORDS, your decision, tho' ill understood,
"Was made, without doubt, on a principle good:
"A PRISONER, you think, shou'd be tenderly us'd,
"And answer that only of which he's accus'd;
"But HASTINGS, my LORDS, has long since been acquainted,
"That we thought KELLORAM deserv'd not to be sainted-
"Besides, should the COMMONERS Articles draw,
"According to rules, and the customs of Law,
"I maintain it would be an iniquitous breach
"Of Privilege, granted to those who IMPEACH-
"But, my LORDS, it would make all the MANAGERS glad,
"To prove KELLORAM bore a character bad."

All this notwithstanding, the COURT ne'er exprest
The least inclination to grant his request;
This failing, PLUMBOSO more artfully try'd
To bring in his proof on the opposite side:
But HASTINGS'S Counsel the danger foresaw,
And the door was close barr'd by the vigilant LAW.
Then BURKE wou'd have prov'd, had the LORDS not refused him,
That HASTINGS'S Libellers daily abus'd him;
And what he conceiv'd a more dangerous thing,
Was, their knowing the proof he intended to bring:
But LAW, who on EDMUND still fixes his eye,
Begg'd to know to what Article this could apply:
In a few minutes after their LORDSHIPS adjourn'd,
And the MANAGERS all to St. STEPHEN'S return'd.

One thing, my dear BROTHER, I have to remark,
Upon something I lately was told by a CLERK:-
CHARLES said to the CHANCELLOR, not a week back,
That in five or six days they wou'd end the attack.
I was frighten'd at this, and inclin'd to suppose,
That in less than a twelvemonth the TRIAL would close;
But now I'm convinc'd that my CHIEF will endeavour
To make the IMPEACHMENT continue for EVER;
And I hope that the LORDS his endeavours will bless,
And grant him, in all things, the wish'd-for success.

SIMKIN.

[in margin]  World April 22. 1790

THE Reporter of the MANAGERS has not been less pleasant on this occasion, than on former ones.

INDEED, my Dear BROTHER, you'll feel yourself wrong,
In declaring that SIM has been silent too long;
When you find that for want of some pleasanter stuff,
I am forc'd to put up with Tobacco and Snuff.
That HERO who gain'd reputation and fame,
By pleading the cause of a Dowager Dame,
Joe Surface, I mean, who was mightily proud
To be rank'd as the Knight of the BEGUMS of OUDE,
Is the champion of Smoakers, and Snuffy-nos'd Beauties,
And pleads to relieve the fair Trader from duties.
Three Hours and a Half, by his voluble tongue,
On Snuff and Tobacco the changes were rung;
But first let me say, he commenced his Oration
By stoutly defending his own reputation.

"Mr. SPEAKER, (said JOE) ever since I arose,
"In defence of Man's Rights, this vile Tax to oppose,
 

Current Status: 
Completed