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[Page 50]
World Jany. 21 1790 [in margin]
[column 1]
One day to affirm, and the next disavow,
And to turn Men's opinions like oxen at plough.
Success will for ever his measures attend,
Who applies with discretion the means to the end;
'Twas, however, affronting CECILIA , to place her
In a station like this - nay, it needs must disgrace her;
And, indeed, at first sight, I suspected a plot -
That the Artist was brib'd and corrupted by SCOTT,
To exhibit that BEGUM (whom EDMUND accus'd)
In the shape of an Angel by HASTING'S abus'd;
Thus throwing discredit on EDMUND'S narration,
From his own inconsistency and variation.
But the MAJOR, if wise, of his cash would be sparing,
For the changes of BURKE are sufficiently glaring.
But sure Inconsistency is not alarming,
For my own part, I think BURKE'S Variety charming:
And now I am reading a Book of that name,
Whose pleasantries vary'd, demonstrate the same.
The Artist display'd some sarcastical fun,
By putting both GREY and ANSTRUTHER for one;
In the doing of which, he adopted the plan
Of their putting Nine Taylors to make up a Man;
Thence concluded, that RAJAH CHEYT SING to pourtray,
Would take two such Men as ANSTRUTHER and GREY.
Or, perhaps, into error the Artist was led,
By something that ANSTRUTHER formerly said:
For who would conceive that CHEYT SING was the same,
The identical Person, as well as the name
Whom ANSTRUTHER said, in his Conscience, he held
To be legally fin'd, and with justice expell'd;
Who now, as that Versatile Hero contends,
Was punish'd unjustly for villanous ends.
Farewell, I shall write you again, when I glean
The Acts of th' Apostles (the Patriots I mean).
SIMKIN.
[in margin] World Jany. 21.1790.
At the re-appearance of this pleasant WRITER, who will not rejoice? To the MANAGERS, he may be said to be - the HARBINGER of DAY. And that matter well worth recording may be given, the MANAGERS must take care - Of the RECORDER there cannot be doubt.
SIMON in WALES, to his BROTHER SIMKIN in TOWN.
THRO' TAFFY LAND, Brother, a rumour has spread,
That SIMKIN, alas! must be certainly dead,
From your silence unusual, the rumour arose,
Or from something, 'tis likely, that nobody knows.
Some think you're disgusted at losing the post
Of RECORDER to BURKE, and his tongue-fighting Host:
But I hope that my SIMKIN, though B--- is unjust,
Will not hold himself back, giving way to disgust;
Though Lady D---NC---N---N'S RECORDER elect,
Your Verses in Wales will be read with respect.
Your Kindred and Friends all unite in beseeching,
That as ED---D and COLLEAGUES go on with impeaching,
Notwithstanding your present official dismission,
You will, in defiance of BURKE'S prohibition,
In Boxes, as formerly, take up your station,
And give us the substance of every Oration.
From your Letters, when finish'd, I mean to compose
A curious Collection of E---D'S Bon Mots,
Of ideas sublime, dress'd in beautiful Prose.
The Work will be useful, as well as amusing,
And instructive to Youth in the arts of abusing.
There's STOCKDALE, who deals in political writing,
Who has suffer'd in pocket, I hear, from indicting;
And to make up the loss, in the way of his trade,
Is selling the Speech that his Advocate made; --
That Speech must be able, conclusive and strong,
Which could prove to a Jury the COMMONS were wrong:
Through TAFFY LAND, ERSKINE has spread his renown
By this Speech, so I beg you will send it us down.
This STOCKDALE, hereafter, shall publish my Work,
I mean the Bon Mots of the Orator BURKE:
And the sayings of CHARLEY and JOSEPH are equal
In value, and are to appear in the sequel.
We have Children of four, who, in high imitation
Of the Westminster Heroes, can make an Oration
For an hour by the clock, against base peculation.
One thing I have heard, but I can't think true.
[indecipherable] were, it had surely been mention'd by you:
ANSTRUTHER, they say, was once HASTING'S Friend,
And in Leadenhall-street did his conduct defend;
That conduct which now 'tis his pride to attack,
And to prove to the COURT is so frightfully black;
That very same conduct he proved to be right,
Without spot or blemish, and perfectly white.
Oh! tell me, Dear SIM, can this possibly be,
If the story were grounded, I'm certain the Court
Would think all he said a mere matter of sport:
All the BISHOPS would pray for new light to conduct 'em,
And in ANSTRUTHER'S mystical ways to instruct 'em.
Lord TOWNSHEND would ask him, if what he express'd
That day, should be constru'd in earnest or jest?
Lord THURLOW would think it extremely provoking,
That his time should be spent to hear ANSTRUTHER'S joking;
Unless he loves Music, and therefore rejoices
In the harmony sweet of the MANAGER"S Voices.
But, pray, can a Sophist so able be found,
As to prove the same Timber's both rotten and sound?
I'm convinc'd. on reflection, it cannot be true;
For 'tis more than the wisest Attorney can do:
The man who confesses he once has deceiv'd,
Has no reason to hope he'll again be believ'd.
I shall finish this Letter with high expectation,
Of your giving new proofs of your Verification,
In ANSTRUTHER'S, FOX'S, or EDMUND'S Oration.
The Lungs of the latter, from resting so long,
Have recover'd, no doubt, and are active and strong;
From practising oft in the BENCH and the PLEAS,
ANSTRUTHER can speak with more freedom and ease:
The LORDS have recover'd, 'tis hop'd, from their fears,
And got well of the bruises they had in their ears;
Whilst HASTINGS, grown callous from habit and us,
Can bear, with more patience, reproach and abuse.
I have heard something else, which I almost forgot;
'Tis improbable, therefore I credit it not:
By his friends and his foes 'tis in gen'ral expected,
That BURKE, as a Candidate, will be rejected,
And never in PARLIAMENT be re-elected:
There was something he said of a PERSONAGE ROYAL,
Which is highly resented by all that are Loyal;
Perhaps the same story related by you,
'Tis the HURLING I mean, but I hope 'tis not true.
Oh, SIMKIN ! you soon must want food for your pen,
If depriv'd of this best of Political Men;
I will work double tides, and his character raise
By my Verse, and the HERALD shall publish his praise;
Were I suffer'd to whisper in MAJESTY'S Ear,
I could arguments bring, irresistibly clear,
That if BURKE utter'd language that border'd on Treason,'
'Twas when disappointment had smother'd his Reason;
That HIS MAJESTY'S Servants were chiefly in fault,
Who reward'd BURKE's merit much lest than they ought;
For where is the man who has stronger pretension
To a PAYMASER'S Place, or a MINISTER'S Pension ?
I have heard that he once was for starving the ------,
But you know that revenge is a pitiful thing;
Nor can we expect that so generous a man,
Should follow his own œconomical plan.
Indeed, my Dear BROTHER, I cannot help thinking,
'Tis our interest, conjointly, to save him from sinking,
By hiding his faults, and his virtues revealing --
So forget his unkindness, and stifle your feeling.
SIMKIN
The delay of last night, from being sent to us at so late an hour, gives us less cause to regret, as we are enabled by it to add the pleasant Postscript that follows it.
SIMKIN to his BROTHER SIMON in WALES
Oh, BROTHER ! Oh, BROTHER ! with deep tribulation
I must try to unfold an afflicting Narration:
I'm tortur'd with grief, I'm alarmed with my fears,
I blot all I write with a torrent of tears.
When the Mob of this City that building pull'd down,
Which let all the Vagabonds loose on the Town,
It gave not the Cits so much cause to lament,
As the People now have for this dreadful event.
Not even the Greeks, when the lawless ATRIDES
Took BRISEIS away from her Lover PELIDES;