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[Page 39]
thats its not hard to die, its much harder to live at times. When I was wounded I heard the shell coming nearer & nearer & made absolutely certain I was going to be killed, in fact it was the greatest surprise to me that I wasn't (it only landed 5 yards off on a road just behind me) & the only thing I kept saying to myself was "now I musn't lose consciousness, I musn't lose touch", in fact I think I was almost disappointed to find myself still alive. I did not see before me a panorama of all my past, nor did I recall all my sins in that moment (that would have been to big a task for the time) & I had not the slightest fear of death which I was certain was imminent, but it all seemed to be rather an adventure, something to be experienced – of course my mental attitude towards death was one arising from continual thought & wonder speculation as to its nature – often I have thought, when I've been in a place where a shall might come along any minute, now what will it be like? Is there really